Part of the Furniture

As our eldest snuggled up to me last night and elbowed me in the boob and our two-year-old stood on my little toe as he climbed on my knee, I realised that, to my children, I really am just part of the furniture:

• Mattress – in bed in the mornings, out toddler climbs up and lies down flat on me, tummy to tummy.
• Settee – they recline on me at will, sometimes adjusting my arms and legs to make me more ‘comfortable’.
• Cushion – my boobs are ‘plumped up’ (bless them for attempting the impossible) to make a soft head-rest.
• Table – on which to leave left-over food and to balance their plates.
• Tissue – my shoulder is as good as anything on which to wipe their noses.
• Clothes Horse – for coats, bags, hats, shoes and discarded jumpers.
• Vending machine – to supply a constant stream of food and drink.
• Television – to provide entertainment when they’re bored.
• Hot water bottle – they wrap my limbs around them as though I’m filled with hot water.
• Blanket – when they feel like something soft to cuddle up to.
• Floor – I must be seen as part of floor for the number of times they stand on my feet.
• Cherry picker – to lift them up to peer over fences and walls, see in a mirror or out of a window.
• Drawer/bin – in which to store snotty tissues, small toys and sweet wrappers.
• Climbing frame – to be used as a ‘leg-up’ to get to something else they want.
• Toilet/nappy – well, let’s face it, I’ve been pooed on more times than I care to mention!

Happy Friday, everyone.  Hope it’s a good one. 🙂